What's out there?

In every parent's wish for their child, there's an unspoken prayer - 'don't make the same mistakes that I did, be much much more then I ever was'

Don't be afraid to make mistakes, baby. That was my biggest mistake and oh, how much I have missed because of that. But, sweetie, we live and learn, that's what matters.

My own little miracles

I find it a miracle that:

…..two people from different religions, race and family backgrounds
could fall in love as deeply as we do

…..we are given the strength to ride the storms of
family feuds, poverty and infertility
and to come out of it…
still holding hands

…..we are so fortunate to be blessed with
Life’s Greatest Gift
– our son Darrel

…..even now, you still take me as I am,
the good, the bad and the ugly parts of me.

Thank you, Lord,
for this miraculous life You’ve blessed me with,
and for this little thing called LOVE.

My world, my joy, my everything

I suck at stitching, so this stiched paper is a real blessing for me.
From the first time I saw it, I knew it would be the perfect paper for my favourite photo of Darrel (for now, that is).

This is quite an easy peasy one, I just cut out the butterfly pattern a bit to insert the chipboard branch. Added some painted chipboards for accents, painted the title: "My world" with acrylic paint and stamped on it here and there. Traced a chipboard birdie onto a patterned paper. Sticked them here & there, added trims and scrap papers aaand… we’re done! The paper’s already beautiful, there was really not much left for me to do.

A world of imagination

Trivial? You bet!

So un-noble of me? Hell, yeah!

But tell me, honestly, aren't you tempted?

If there's such a world, wouldn't you pack your bag on a moment's notice?

Taking chances....

………..is sooo not me. It’s true that I often jump and worry about the consequences later on, but that only happens when it involves matters of the heart, things I value significantly. For other things… I’m very conservative.

I’m a fraidy cat….. I’m scared of trying new things, I’m scared that people would think I’m different, I’m scared of making mistakes - VERY, I’m scared of taking chances because then I wouldn’t be able to control the end-result. Although if you really think about it – who could ever control that?

When I started planning to have a baby, I began to think: (pretty late, huh… - as my friend Dina would put it: where have you been, Laine? Errr, not sure – control freak land, I suppose). Do I want my baby to imitate that? To live a life so cautiously calculated that everything gets so predictable and boring and tense? To have him ended up in a job that he hate but had to do anyway for 8 freakin years – just because in college he took a major that was considered by most people as the safest route to stability? Hell, no! Those were my mistakes, and I hope they would remain mine not his.

I hate accounting, hate every last bit of it… and yet I managed to have a career up to senior manager level in a big 4 accounting firm. From society’s point of view – I’m pretty ok. From personal point of view – I’m pretty screwed up. Who would spend 8 years doing something she hate? That would be me – the fool that I am. All because I’m too afraid to try something different, to take the path less travelled.

A couple of years ago, I was given the opportunity to try something new at work – involving branding & graphic designs; which I knew squat about. Literally squat. Photoshop? Heard of it – had something to do with pictures, right? Cropping, masking, layer, InDesign, design principles, layout, grids, margin, bleed & slug…… errrrr, mmmm,excuse me… I felt like I was in a whole new country with a totally different language. Not to mention that I’m technologically illiterate (or gaptek – as we Indonesians normally put it). But I thought, what the hell… let’s just see if I can work this one out.

And guess what… I love it! The feeling of trying something totally new and discover that I can handle that – with many scratches and bruises, of course, but hey… I managed. And for once in my life, coming to work doesn’t feel like a heavy burden.

So, to remember that feeling I decided to make something, with mediums I’ve never tried before. Canvas and paint – I know squat about them, too. And here it is, my first scratch and bruise playing with something new:

I know, I know, you’d say: Laine, what the hell were you thinking? My answer is: None, I didn’t think. I just created. And yes, it’s hideous… I agree, but I love it – because of the story behind it. :)

Here’s to taking chances!